sana 1 month pa lang tayo...

sana one month pa lang tayo.. baket?

- kase dati dinadalaw mo ako sa amin
- kase dati sumasama ka sa sa amin
- kase dati nakakalabas pa tayo at nakakanood ng sine pag weekends
- kase dati ramdam ko yung super kilig feeling...

- ngayon kase parang wala na yun
- ngayon kase sabi mo familiar na tayo sa isa't isa kaya ganun

pero teka, hindi ba dapat dahil mas familiar na tayo eh dapat alam naten kung ano yung gusto at nagpapasaya paminsan minsan sa mahal mo?

hindi naman malaking effort hinihiling ko eh. ano ba naman yung manood tayo ng sine sa friday? iniisip ko magrereview ka, pero hindi naman nangyayari yun..

sine lang naman eh. sobra na ba yun?


NALULUNGKOT AKO!

when is my time...

eversince i had my boyfriend, i always look forward to that day, when i would be in that white long gown and holding a bouquet.. kelan kaya?

and just a few minutes ago i was watching videos a friend made for some people who are planning to get married. nakakatouch. nakakatuwa. nakakakilig. at higit sa lahat, parang nakakainggit..

simula nung naging kami ni M, eh we've been talking about our wedding. not so explicitly sa mga details and so, pero practical stuff. like when kaya kami may ipon na, how much the budget will be and so on.

M is not the romantic type. hindi nga daw sya sweet according to him. pero sabi nya lang un. akala nya lang siguro yun.

hindi naman ako malungkot, in fact, natutuwa in a sense na it doesn't scare him talking about that big day! sabi namin sa 2011. pero sana yun din ang plan ni Lord, no? ;)

--- random pics----

yan si hon. kasama yung isang mata ni pepper.. eh kase naman,pinanggigilan si Pepper..
Next time, upload pako dami. Pinagtripan ko lang sila ni Pepper dito habang tulog pa si Hon. hahaha. :)

friends? uwi na... work...

daming chika tong entry ko..

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ayun. booooring sa work. hehe. kahit alam kong maraming work. haha. in short natatamad ako. *lingon sa paligid, baka may nagbabasa ng tinatype ko* haha!

anyways, i've been checking my FB resto from time to time. eh laging down, so ayun, nagayus ng outlook email. eh kakatamad din. haha. kaya eto nagblog.

so ayun na nga. inaccept ng ex nya ang friendship invite ko sa FB. eh matagal narin naman yung "isyu" namin, so i guess we're really ok.

hindi ko naman dedeny. medyo imbyerna parin ako paminsan minsan. i guess ganun talaga. babae ako at may emosyon, tulad nya. ewan. ipagpapasa Diyos ko nalang talaga.
Hay Lord, help me po! :)

So kamusta kami ni BF? so far, so good. bukas eh independence day sa Pinas, so date na naman kami. hehe. tuwing holidays lang namin kami nagkakaron ng chance magdate. haha!

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ibang chica..

si MINK, uuwi na dito.. sa *toot* secret muna eh. ah basta, excitement ang lola mo. gimik galore kami ni MINK-MINK. miss ko yun eh, bonggang bongga talaga. i feel like i can be myself at all times with her (take note of that word ah!) haha! and i just hope she feels the same talaga. iba ang feeling eh. kase yung mga sisters ko naman eh medyo malaki age gap, so medyo lost ang lola mo. diba? although im blessed with my sisters pero iba parin yung may ka-level kang sisterette diba? :)
sana matuloy ang mga lakad naten.
post ako pics pag nagkaron kami ng many pics. of course, si Belle ang photographer namin! hay! excited ako!
Mink, magphotoshoot tayo ah! punta tayo sa manila! intramuros and the like! super excited nako!

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toxic sa work. haha. kaya tinatamad ako minsan. haha. anu daw? honestly, i wanna take a one week leave. sana sama si BF. haha! kaso pareho kami needed super duper sa work. hay pano ba itesh?

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awa ako kay Ma. dipa padala si pa ng pambayad sa house. :( hay, kung pwede lang akong umebak ng pera aba eh gagawin ko maghapon at magdamag. kaya ayoko pa rin magsettle down. yoko nakikita ganun si Ma eh. huhuhuhu..

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osha naiiyak na naman ako. kaloka. PERIOD.

isip isip...

isang beses ko palang nakakasama yun family nya. and it was during an outreach event we had last february. it was his whole family there. masaya nun. pero syempre no chance to kwent kwento etc.

tapos nun, nakausap ko ulit ng mabilis mommy nya nung minsang sinundo nila siya sa opisina. nag-effort ako nun na sumama sa kanya, para mag-hi lang. yun.

naiisip ko kase na baka sabihin nila eh suplada ako. na baket ganun gf ng anak nila.

eh kase din naman no, hindi pa ako nakakapunta sa kanila - sa bulacan. north to south kase ang drama ng geography namin eh. hmmmm, pero diba dapat mag-effort. eh kase si M din naman eh nagpapakapractical. sabi nya, masyado daw malayo for me and wala naman daw occassions para isama ako dun.

oo nga naman. ano nga ba naman gagawin namin dun.

hay, napapaisip lang ako.

tama na nga.

Reklamo #1

hindi to actually ang unang reklamo ko kay sa kanya. marami na, pero ngayon ko lang naisipan i-blog. anyways, eto ang nangyari.

nasa trabaho ako, wala sya. nagYM sya saken, typical kwentuhan. tapos nagsabi na "hon dipa ko nagdidinner" so ako naisip ko na gusto mo bilhan ka ng food. so ayun na nga, bibilhan ko nalang ikaw. hindi agad sya makadecide kung san papabili, naiirita nako. nahihirapan magchat at magtrabaho at the sametime kase ngarag nako dahil nga malapit na uwian.

and so i called him, sya pa nainis. kase naman hindi daw nya alam kung ano yung "smokey's" kung brand daw ba yun o ano. sasagutin ko lang daw naman. anyway, natapos ang usapan na yun bibilhin ko. iritable ako, pero ok pa naman.

so i bought his dinner, hindi nga lang sa smokey's kase sarado na.

pagdating ng shuttle (may service provided kase company namin), intay nalang ako sa ibang passengers. kainis kase yung ibang kasabay ko eh hindi alam ang daan, so naligaw pa. in short, ako ang huling hinatid kase out of the way sa kanila, at ala una nako nakauwi! gr. iritable parin ako, pero ok pa.

pagbaba ko ng shuttle, ang lakas ng ulan. basa ako. gr. kairita, pero ok parin, i cant stop the sky from raining.

pagpasok ng apartment, humambalong saken ang makalat na dining table namin! ang kinainan niya andun! nakatiwangwang sa lamesa. take note, disposable ang pinagkainan nya, pwedeng itapon, pero hindi tinapon. kung tinatamad naman humakbang papuntang dirty kitchen para itapon, pwede narin ihagis sa sink, wag lang makalat sa table. believe, it was sooooo messy. ayoko ng kalat - and he perfectly knows that.
pagpasok ng kwarto - badtrip - MAJOR KALAT! the bed was like a disaster, pillows everywhere, shirts (used) laying in the bed, his jacket was on the bed, laptop bag opened on thebed as well! and to add more, books were on the floor, lan cable and more!!!

hindi nako nagsalita, nagligpit nalang ako. iritable ako. ang bwiset, NAIINIS NAKO!

yun lang! nakakainis. baket parang hindi nya nacoconsider tong mga bagay nato. sinabi ko na naman sakanya to eh. AYOKO NG KALAT. yun nalang ang contribution nya - wag magkalat. ive already told him how i wanted things to be in place.

pustahan tayo, pagdating nya ng apartment, ayun, nanood ng NBA. fine. i respect that. he wants his time, pero naman, may commercial diba? i mean kung ayaw nyang magligpit, edi atleast man lang, wag nang magkalat. dba ganun lang naman kasimple yun? mahirap ba yun? kung mahirap yun, baket maraming tao na nakakagwa nun? diba? punyeta talaga.

hay napapamura na ako.

note: this is just the first. i hope there's more to come. im blogging about this all because wanted to keep track of everything. again, everything.

maybe tracking will help me decide and think about this relationship.

on the side, i dont want to give up easily. but we'll see. life is full of risks, and im taking one now - again.

period.

so what's up?

been having "draft blogs" in my site.. as always i would start one and won't end up finishing them.. whew.. i hope this time, it does..

so what's up?

after all those drama i've had with some people, i managed to survive! yep! as always. i always thank the Lord for keeping me up and straight all through those times.. :)

fun times with the family is always fun! although we don't get to go out and have dinner or what, my mom's food is even better than what they would say "our best seller".. my mom's food at the dinner table is always the best for me.

marc and i had our times, but hey, i guess that's all because we're two different people, trying to work things out. im just glad that he's the type who would want to talk about a misunderstanding right then and there.. ako kase, i would myself to cool down a bit and then yun na, talk na. i hate it sometimes, but i see the essence in it. kung galit, eh di sabihin, wala nang arte arte pa, as what marc would always say. he hates me being maarte when we have issues, like, wala nang paliguy-ligoy pa. if he asks and the only answer is either a yes or a no, then yes or no lang talaga. he'll ask for explanation if he think he needs one. im learning.. and he's learning. :) bottomline - we're both doing great..

work? whew! very very busy! but hey, i managed to pass my certification exam! weeeee! :) besides those busy and full of tickets team, my mind still managed to sip the information from 3 inch book i studied! whew! super thanks kay Lord.. from the beginning up to the end, i was like "Lord, help me ha? im doing my job and im pretty sure, you'll bless it" grrrraaabeee talaga.. and this coming week? ayun, training again! minsan it's like i feel bad kase i dont get to work much when im on training, but i guess ganun talaga eh. hehe..

and my friends? haaay, i hardly see them.. well except for those in the office because of course i get to see them everyday - 9 hours! haha. but they are really just few people whom i consider as you know, as friends talaga! i miss peej and trace! and so does the allsides and vero!

what's up for me in the next coming weeks? hmmm.. i surely dont know, but i am pretty sure that the Lord will always be by my side.. :)

i no longer call myself a "christian"

ive been part of this church since 2003 and since then i felt like i was part of a new family - very homey.. until the time came that my church attendance was not 100% because of work or i was sick.

i have epilepsy. and for me to avoid attacks, i have to have atleast 8 hours of sleep everyday. in 2005, i had transferred and tried my luck in the IT world (which i shouldve been part of since i was a comsci grad). anyway, part of the job was to work on graveyard shift which means that i should be asleep in the morning and work in the evening.

you see, worship on sundays are fine. but there are also activities on saturdays that i SHOULD be there (as what the "elders' wives and my so-called friends would say). of course, i couldn't attend activities on a saturday because i need to catch up on my 8-hour sleep.

and so, i wasn't having the complete attendance then.

they started calling me "not holy", "prodigal daughter", "the one who doesn't read the Bible" blah blah blah.

i was able to swallow all those... but then a friend of mine told me it isn't fair. so i started praying for transferring to a new church.

just this year, i was able to. :) thank goodness!

*to be continued*